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  • Bryan Fittin

Overcoming Your Fear of Going Live

Updated: Jul 30



When you think of facing fears, what comes to mind? Skydiving? Public Speaking? Going live is a fantastic marketing tool, but can seem daunting to those who are camera shy. Here are our top 10 tips that make going live one of the best ways to interact with your audience; not one of the most terrifying.


  1. First things first - understand why you are uncomfortable, so you can confront it. If the thought of looking at yourself or hearing your own voice makes you squirm, read up on why your mind and body react the way they do. As Wisteria puts it, “As social creatures, we're hardwired to worry about our reputation and how others perceive us. The decision our brain makes to determine whether or not a situation is stressful is made by sensory input and processing. And for most people, the danger of blowing their lines when they're going live is enough to trigger a fight or flight response.”

  2. Next, know that people do not care if you have it all together. If anything, it makes you look more authentic and relatable. You are your own worst critic. Nobody will care about how smooth you say your lines or how you look in that shirt more than you do.

  3. Also realize that there is no perfect live. Technical issues happen. Messing up a line happens. “People don't want to see a professional, they don't want to see a news anchor. They want to see you.” Showing your imperfections will lead you to authentic interactions.

  4. Breathe. We so often get nervous and somehow forget our most basic life function. 

  5. On a more technical note, don’t look directly into the camera! The best place to look is right above your camera lens. Much like looking in the middle of someone’s forehead, this helps you avoid the awkward feeling of staring straight into someone’s soul. 

  6. Practice makes perfect! If you are nervous that you won’t know what to say in the moment, work on saying things beforehand. Don’t throw caution to the wind when working on what to say, but remember that if you convince yourself you’ll mess us, you’re sure to. 

  7. That saying “If you look good, you feel good,” is true! Wear what makes you feel confident. It will be much easier to stay focused when you are not worried about how your shirt looks every time you move on camera. 

  8. Don’t forget to set an outline of what you’ll be saying. Working a 3 point approach gives your audience a simple, graspable takeaway. Also, set a time you want to aim for. Fifteen to twenty minute lives have been found to have the most engagement.

  9. Keep your eyes on the prize: your audience! Discuss topics that are relevant to your purpose and your audience’s interest. “It takes time to build that community, that audience that really cares and that they would even trust you with their time.” After all, the goal of your live should be to engage with them. 

  10. Last but not least, prepare for mistakes. Like aforementioned, there is no perfect live. When mistakes do end up happening, let them roll off. Even the pros have bad days. These moments only further signal to your audience that you are human. 


Going live can be a walk in the park, even for those who may not have felt all that confident not too long ago. With these tips, you’ll be sure to keep your audience engaged and your stress level low.


Show Notes

[00:05:45] What are you obsessed with?

Bryan: Invisalign

Loren: Valentine’s Date Night Card from Mom

[00:10:06] Why should you go live?

[00:11:26] Psychology & Biology of Fear in Going Live

[00:19:39] Common Fears of Going Live

[00:33:39] Top 10 Going Live Fears

[00:46:45] Rapid Fire Questions

Show Quotes

“As social creatures, we're hardwired to worry about our reputation and how others perceive us. The decision our brain makes to determine whether or not a situation is stressful is made by sensory input and processing. And for most people, the danger of blowing their lines when they're going live is enough to trigger a fight or flight response.” [00:15:58]


“People don't want to see a professional, they don't want to see a news anchor. They want to see you.” [00:20:55]


“It takes time to build that community, that audience that really cares and that they would even trust you with their time.” [00:25:23]


Links

Transcript


Um, a lot of times you just get in front of the camera and you, you feel like you have to have it all laid out perfectly and you don't, I mean, you need to have a plan, but, uh, you don't have to be professional about this. People don't want to see a professional. I don't want to see a news anchor. Right?


Yeah. They want to see you.


We are live. Here we are. Hey, Hey, Oh man. Trying out some new software, so that's always fun. Um, let's see. We're going to double check it here. It will be S all my people out there using OBS. Say what's, uh, uh, we're going to start our recording here. So what are we gonna be talking about, Lauren, as I get everything going here, we are super excited to talk about overcoming the fear of going live.


So we thought it'd be good to go live about this particular topic. That makes sense. That absolutely makes sense. It's not as scary as you think. No. Even when you have technical difficulties and. All the things that are happening. So, um, all right. So I'm excited because we're using OBS and that is open broadcast.


System or services, one of those. Uh, we have used live in the past, which we always recommend it as a live service, but just started to have a lot of issues with, uh, video and quality of the video and stuff like that. So, um, this is actually going to be alive. Uh, we're recording our podcast as well, and so we're kind of doing it all.


So you're getting to witness, uh, everything kind of behind the scenes, right? Yeah. Okay. So. I'm going to go through here. So if you're watching the replay, um, we're going to be, I'm going to get to share these out as well on our fan or profiles here. Make sure we're all out there. And also we have a poll. So if you're a on the, uh, the, we actually have somebody on watching right now, so throw a comment in.


Um, but also take our poll question, which is, have you used Facebook live before? Yeah. There might be a followup one with, have you used Facebook live for your business? That's a great followup. I'm going to make sure this is all going through again, using new software. We just want to make sure everything is correct.


There we go. Sounds good. Is looking good. Very excited about this. Oh, I haven't published the poll. Thank you. All right. Oh, you can now actually take the ball. Oh, look at that. Fancy. Very, very fancy. All right. I can hear my very Southern voice coming through the microphone here. I'm going to go ahead and close that out.


Boom. It's rock and roll. Yeah. go. We are recording on our board. Are you recording on our camera? We're also recording on OBS. We have three different recordings as well as Facebook. So when we finish this, we're going to publish this video and that one will be, uh, our fourth recording. Always have a backup to everything.


Always have a backup. So, um, okay. All right. Ready to rock and roll here. Let me get my system up. We're gonna. Move this thing over. I'm very excited, especially if you guys have some questions about what kind of systems we use or what kind of processes or whatever. Um, we have all kinds of things and I love to talk tech, so definitely jump in there.


Um, if you want to talk some tech, I'm all about talking that tech. So, all right, here we go. Hey, what's up everybody? Welcome back to the go road podcast. My name is Brian Fitton. Uh, this is the podcast dedicated to marketers, small business owners who are trying to do marketing differently, especially around live video, podcasting, all that, and putting out content marketing.


One is to do it differently, right? Connecting with an audience, giving value, that type of thing. So if you're here and that's you, this podcast is for you. So, um, I have the awesome Ms. Lauren Lewis with me today. Hello. Good to have you here today, Lauren, and we're going to talk about something very. Uh, I dunno, it's, it's becoming a normal thing in our society.


Obviously do like Facebook live video and different types of live video, but, uh, we're going to talk about the fear of going live and how to overcome that fear, right? Yes, absolutely. It's something we run into all the time. Um, in our line of work or, yeah. A lot of people say that they are very afraid to click that live button and we would love to just chat about how you can be confident to go live and there's nothing really to fear.


Or there's practical steps to get over that. Yeah, absolutely. Well, and the fun thing is, if you're not already first subscribed to our podcast, make sure you subscribe, give us a rating and review. That obviously helps get that content out to other people who are looking forward. But also, uh, if you're not following us on social media, we're actually doing this podcast live.


So we're doing a live recording. Talking about live and overcoming the fears of going live so much, so much. It's just inception happening constantly. So, uh, if you're listening to this after the fact or watching the replay, um, we do put these on Facebook, on Instagram, and also on YouTube. And so make sure that you, uh, find us on those platforms.


Go rogue ex. Usually it's go dot rogue dot. X on Instagram, um, as well as Facebook and, and a YouTube and a, yeah. And LinkedIn, LinkedIn, so, but live, we're on Facebook right now, and so I make sure to jump over there because we do this periodically, so we'd love to have you jump on in comments as we go through this.


Yeah. All right, so before we get into the content though, I always like to start with something fun. What does that, Lauren, we always like to start episodes with. What are you obsessed with this week? So Brian. What are you obsessed with this week? Oh, so the last podcast we had, I talked about my aunt ears, which I got.


If you're watching live video, I'm very excited about my inner monitors. Everybody thinks her hearing AIDS. Apparently I will need those at some point, but now they're custom made, so when I get old, actually, I think your ears grow anyway. All right. That would be way off though. be outside. Super weird. Oh.


Anyway. Uh, so that was my last one, but I've, this week, um, I started using Invisalign. So I've partnered with, um, one of our friends over at the pediatric dental associates, um, and orthodontics that makes sense as the orthodontics at the end. Um, and so. I'm now doing. So they were actually, they, they help out adults as well.


It's not just kids. And so anyway, we got to talking and, um, working with him to do my Invisalign. So I actually got that put in last week and I have been consistent. Somebody told me, they're like, I'm just not disciplined enough to where you're in Invisalign. I'm like, I'm making sure, cause I'm very excited.


I had braces when I was a kid. I didn't wear my retainer. So it just kind of all went back. And so I'm very excited for another opportunity to get my teeth straightened. You know? That's awesome. Lauren thinks it's hilarious. I don't think it's hilarious. It's just, it's funny how excited you are. Um, but I actually was really impressed when you did get them, but there was not a very noticeable difference in the way that you talk.


I thought that was pretty impressive. I should've just worn them right now. Yeah, I did take them out, by the way, that I'm not wearing them right now. Everyone's just looking for, yeah, you're supposed to wear them for 22 hours out of the day, which is a long time. There's a long time, but basically you're taking them out to eat.


They're not supposed to have like anything but water while you wear them. So my coffee and I'm like, pop them out when I'm drinking my coffee and Buffalo. It is, but Hey, it's worth it. Yeah. Know. What are you obsessed with this week, Lauren? So this one's kind of weird. Not normally. It's like a show or something like that.


But today. It's my mom. So my mom has been so sweet since I was in college. She's always sent me a Valentine's day card, which is really sweet. And she totally puts a gift card and I, which just makes it like really, really nice. Yeah. So I assumed when I got married that that would just stop, you know. Um, cause you know, that's kind of more of a romantic.


Um, and she didn't, and now she sends me and my husband a gift card to a restaurant. Really? Yeah. So she's like, I want to make sure you guys have good date nights, and it's always really sweet. And then once we had kids, she's sent them an individual. Card. Um, and she'll even pay for like the postage for each of them to get their own separate card.


So they were like, yeah, they were super excited about it day. And I always forget about it and then I see it in the mail and I'm like, mom, you've been doing this for so long and it's so sweet. And it totally made my day to day cause today was awful. And so I was like. Super like, mom, this is awesome. So shout out to the moms out there.


Yeah. Yeah. I do have like, there's a photo that came up that, uh, my Facebook memories or whatever it was, like an episode or not episode, a a Valentine's day that I was with my mom. I was singled out a year and I spent it with my mom and so there's still a photo. I bought her flowers and stuff and so, yeah.


Yeah, it was good. I am sweet sometimes. Sometimes. All right, so let's transition into overcoming the fear of going live. Oh, wow. It was really intense. Was it good? I went for that. Went for that. Um, yeah. So Lauren, start us off here. Okay, so tonight we're going to be breaking it down into, we're going to be chatting about the psychology slash biology behind.


This fear. There's actually reasons why you feel the way that you do. And then we're going to talk about some of the common fears that we hear about going live and what you can do to overcome them. And then we're going to end off with our top 10 tips to conquer your fear of pushing the go live button.


Cause ultimately we want, after you listened to this episode, for you to feel empowered. To try it yourself if you never have or for you to consistently start going live. Um, just because there's so many advantages to that. And so, Brian, real quick, before we go into the deep fears, why should you be going live if maybe you're a business and marketer or thinking absolutely.


First off, you should always be on the cutting edge of technology. Right? And especially in the communication world. So, um, there's a podcast I listen to. It's like the communication shift. That's the biggest communication shift that's happened in the past 500 years is happening right now. Right. The printing press came, and then now, obviously with the internet and how we communicate with each other, and so obviously going live on these platforms, it's free.


For one. Right? You're just automatically, you're able to do that. But I'm really is an authentic connection because it's not a pre-produced video, right? They're not cuts and edits in between this. And so, um, it's very authentic and you can interact. Um, like we're doing right now. I'm actually, we have a comment on our Facebook live right now that, uh, Lauren, you were explaining me about my inner ears.


Not, not growing. And so it's one of those things. It's like we're able to interact with the people who are joining us. So we have several people on with our Facebook live right now that we're doing, uh, being able to call some of those people out. Alex is out there. Davis Nicholson's out there too. So it's interacting with that.


And so we appreciate you guys, uh, joining our live tonight. And so that is one of those things that makes an authentic connection and for your business, for your personal life or whatever, if you're trying to reach more people to serve them and obviously help them out, this is a great way to do it.


Awesome. Okay. So we're going to dive into kind of the research that we found when we were looking into what is the psychology, and there's a little bit of biology that goes into that fear that you feel. Um, so the first one that I was looking at was this, the term is called mere exposure. And this is one of the reasons why you do not like being in front of the camera.


Um, okay, so this is a little bit of a longer quote, so stick with me, okay. Okay. It says, the reason you hate the way you look on video is the combo effect of mere exposure and confirmation. Biased formulated in 1968. Hi, psychologist, Robert . It's the junk. Okay. The mere exposure effect certs that people react more favorably to things they see more often.


Since we see ourselves most frequently in the mirror. This is our preferred self image according to the mere exposure effect. When your slight Faisal facial. Symmetries are left and flipped by the camera. You see an unpeeling unappealing, deformed version of yourself. I completely understand that. Yes. As a photographer, I would assume that you would totally get that.


Um, and so basically, if you're always looking into a mirror, the actual difference that you're going to see you want from a photography perspective is going to be different than what you're used to looking at. Um, and so what your brain is basically telling is that that's not what I'm supposed to look like, even though.


It actually is. Yeah. That's what everyone else sees. That's interesting. Yeah. Which might make sense of also some of the things when we talk about, you know, people see some different things about us. It's probably cause they're also seeing a different, a slightly different version. And we always joke about it.


It's like self-awareness is really such a valuable trait to have. Um. Because there is one thing on there too, of kind of being a okay with who you are, how you look and being caught off guard, right? If somebody takes a candid photo of you that you know, it is your side and it's your not so good side of your face or something, which you're used to looking in the mirror, um, we naturally go to there.


I would naturally look in the mirror and we're like, uh, giving ourselves like different looks to make, make us feel better, you know, and then somebody kept, captures a candid of us and it takes us off guard and so that makes sense. That makes sense. Yeah. So that's called mere exposure. And the second one is confirmation bias.


And so they said confirmation bias is our tendency to search for and find information that backs up our previously held beliefs and reinforces our brains. Here's a fancy word, heuristics. Okay. Okay, here's six. Our brain tricks or shortcuts that help humans make sense of the world around them in rapid pace.


Okay? Um, so we want to be right, so we look for all the information that's going to cooperate on our thoughts. If you think you're going to look awkward on camera when reviewing your video, you will actively search out evidence that that is true. This means that some people can only ever see their faults.


Wow. Yeah, and that's why you need good people in your life that are saying, Hey, that was really good. You actually did come. I need like again that self self awareness. We always assume that it's going to be terrible. It's going to be look the worst that I have ever looked and I sounded really stupid and all that.


Most of the time people don't even see that. They see who you are as a person and that authentic connection and are okay with that. So you can see like the combined. Like with the mirror exposure and confirmation bias together, um, can be kind of a powerful force to work against. Um, and so if you're more actively aware that you do these things, a lot of times you can overcome them easier as well.


Yeah, absolutely. So I'm a jump. We have a comment from Alex's says, Whoa, that's crazy. Also probably why wouldn't taking selfies? It looks good while you're taking it, but once the photo adjusts to the Amir, it, it looks super weird, right? Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Awesome. Awesome. And again, if you're watching on the live, throw some comments in there.


Talk to us here. We're obviously going in pretty deep on some of this stuff, so it was very interesting. So thank you, Alex, for commenting. Switch from the psychology to a little bit of biology. Yes. Okay. Finally. Oh, that's what you were wanting. That's why I love biology. Very excited. Okay. Um, okay, so stressful situations can trigger our bodies to go into flight or fight mode.


Okay. So we know this like way, it's kind of that adrenaline surge. Um, and so the quote that I got was actually from, I'm going to say this wrong, is it Wistia? Is that how you pronounce. Oh yeah. Yeah. So they did this awesome article and then we will put links to it in our blog. Um, and I loved this. I'm kind of going on stage fright on camera is what they were talking about.


And so they said, as social creatures, we're hardwired to worry about our reputation and how others perceive us. The decision our brain makes it to determine whether or not a situation is stressful is made by sensory input and processing. And for most people, the danger of blowing their lines when they're going live is enough to trigger a fight or flight response.


Yeah. Okay. So what they're saying is what exactly happens when that is triggered? Basically. And so they go into your brain triggers and secretes what they call, I'm not going to do the whole scientific term. They put it in a little acronym, a C T H is the, um. . That's very boring. I know that, you know.


Anyways, basically this is when the adrenaline hits your body. And so when in fight or flight happens, these are the kind of reactions that you normally can receive. So your neck and back in tense up and you slouch, your muscles prepare for attack and your legs and hands shake good at your blood pressure jumps.


Your digestion shuts off to maximize delivery of nutrients to muscles and vital organs, which causes butterflies. And your pupils dilate. So it's difficult to read anything up close. So this is what happens. Like if you are really nervous in front of the camera, and a lot of times you're actually going to be getting that surge of adrenaline and you're going to actually go through a fight or flight response.


Your body isn't ready for survival. It's crazy, right? So what they said is. So when you're standing in front of a camera and start to feel anxious or get stagefright, you're not just forgetting the words. You can't even actually think of them. And it doesn't help if your pupils are dilated, like you can't even read.


Um, but what the encouraging part is, when you hear all this, it makes it sound like we're pretty much screwed, you know? But this doesn't mean you're hardwired to freeze up in front of a camera forever. In fact, just as your brain can be tricked into tensing up during stressful situations, you cannot trick your brain into feeling more confident.


Oh, interesting. And so that was like their whole purpose was going into understanding if your body is going into that, you can walk yourself back off basically. And this is good, cause I actually have this in like normal conversations, which is random people. I get all like and I can't though. So this is not just in front of the camera, obviously.


This has. I was thinking about this. Um, I won't specifically named, but we had a particular time where we were doing some training about Facebook live and we had someone who is incredibly nervous, and I wish I would have had some of this information yeah. To help her out because I think she was just super embarrassed about it.


Yeah. It was a nerve wracking thing. Absolutely. So, and that's something too, I've had to come to realize is I've done this for years. So I've, I started in with special and Facebook live first came out actually mere cat. What's going to throw it back to you? Remember mere cat. Okay. Mere cat was like one of the first streaming services that that came out.


And so, uh, I started interacting on that. And then when Facebook live launched, I started a show called light chasers where he interviewed other photographers and we did a live. Yeah. And so I forced myself to do that, to be able to interview people, to be able to get them on camera and make them feel comfortable and make sure that I can kind of steer the ship as we're doing this, but also interact with comments and different things like that.


It's, it's definitely intense. Yeah. And it's even more intensive. You're just, you talking directly to camera, so it's a big deal. Yeah, absolutely. So kind of thinking about those things in mind, so we've talked a little bit about the psychology with like mere confirmation and confirmation, or from your confirmation.


Okay. Confirmation your exposure and confirmation bias. Um, and then we also talked about the biology of the fight or flight. So these are kind of things that can be kind of working against you. But again, now I'll just kind of power in this situation where you can really, if you're understanding that you might be hardwired to do that, preparing yourself ahead of time.


And so that's kind of where we're going to go into is the common fears that we hear a lot in our industry of why people are excuses people might give to not go live. Um, or just natural responses. Okay. So the first one is, I'm not ready to do video. I'm not a professional okay, so how would you negate that one?


I was saying you don't have to be a professional to go live. Well, I mean, one, we talk about it. You don't need professional equipment. So right now, obviously we're talking in professional minds. We have lighting, we have a camera here. Uh, but most of the time I'm, you can go live on your phone. I think people are becoming more and more comfortable with that.


Yeah. Um, and I, I mean, honestly, being able to say, I mean, I'm not professional is just one of those things that I, we always say, well, what are the questions that people ask you about your business? Right? What are the most common questions? And I guarantee you, any business owner, anybody who's in a specific industry says, Oh yeah, they way they ask about this and this and this and this and this.


We talk about that. I'm, we're going to talk about a little bit later of things to discuss, but, um, a lot of times you just get in front of the camera and you, you feel like you have to have it all laid out perfectly and you don't, I mean, you need to have a plan, but a, you don't have to be a professional about this.


People don't want to see a professional, they don't want to see a news anchor. Right? Yeah. They want to see you so. Yeah, and I think like practice makes perfect and I think it really, I mean, just getting in front of the camera itself. Um, and I think now that it's with your phone, it doesn't feel as intense.


Um, we have like a professional setup right now and that's the not the norm for most people. And so, um, it's not as intense as staring into the actual circular lens of the camera. It's now just like your small phone, which you're used to taking selfies on. You're used to taking videos on it. Um, this differences that you've just pushed a button to the stream.


Yeah, absolutely. Well, in a way, and we may talk about this a little later, but a way to really get over that fear a lot of times is, uh, doing stories. Stories is a great way to be able to do short recorded clips if you're not completely comfortable going live in front of people. Being able to actually go through and, and like record those 15 seconds like that helps get you comfortable with the camera.


That's a really good tip. Hey, thanks. If you don't tell you, Oh, we can shut it off now. Let's just go home. That was good. That was good. Instagram stories. That's it. All right, so this one is actually probably, I would say one of the most common that we hear is, what would I even talk about if I was to go live, which would kind of hit on a little bit, right.


Um, talk about the things just depends on who you're connecting with, who your audiences. Uh, you know. For us, we understand that, you know, our marketing professionals and that type of thing. So we know who we're talking to. Um, when we're, when we're going through this. But, uh, if it is your customers or your business, you understand you're, you're in it every single day.


You know who you're dealing with. Um, that's one of the things that's like, I'm sure you can have frequently asked questions and just cover those. There's probably 20 different topics you could probably cover with just that. Absolutely. I think with a lot of times when we sat down and we've started going through those frequently asked questions, then each one of those questions you're like, Oh, and we could also talk about this, and we could also talk about, you know, and it's like, it just becomes a long list of 50 topics.


Now, once you get through those 50 topics, sometimes you have to get a little bit of creative. But we like to talk about evergreen content. That's one of my favorite ways. Evergreen content is so great because it just never gets old because you will continue. If you're a roofing company, I'm sure you get the same questions and you could make videos of that every single year and update those, and we've actually done that with several people.


It's like, well, I talked about this last year. It's like, well. Did it? Is it old? No, I can still talk about the same thing. It's always, it's always relevant. So it's relevant content. Yeah. So there's always going to be a lot of things to talk about. And I think one of the things that's great about live is that it's not like when you push the button, it's like, well, you have to go for 30 minutes.


Um, you can go for a shorter time and, you know, you can work into the algorithms of what works best and all those kinds of things. But for practice, for sure, I mean, start with, if you need to chart with shorter lives, that's okay. There's nothing, there's no rule that's going to, you know, you're not gonna get like a penalty flag or something.


So anyways, um, totally. It's totally possible that there's a lot more than you realize to talk about. Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. Okay. Here's another one. Oh, finally, push the button. You went live. It happened. And nobody watched. Nobody showed up. It's surprising cause we've had, and I ha, we have to tell people this all the time, right?


It's not always about the live interaction. It can be about the replay. So I always make sure that whenever you go live on whatever platform, make sure you share that. Right? It's about the replay viewers too. So, uh, yeah, I would say consistency right? And even our lives, not that we're doing. So, um, we've had upwards of, I think, 14 people that have jumped on, which is the most we've ever had.


Um, and so it is one of those that, you know, we're hovering right around that seven or eight, which you don't think is a lot, but if you're in a room full of 14, 15 people, I, that's a lot of people to talk to you. Right? And so kind of think of it like that, Hey, you know, it's not always a, a bunch of numbers, but consistency, sharing it out.


And then also. Understanding when people are watching live video. So we're doing this at night because there's a lot of people that are at home hanging out and sitting on the couch. Right. Uh, and so they want to obviously interact with that at that time. So it just depends. Yeah, absolutely. And I think about it, you know.


Again, we're going back to that, that practice aspect, and you have to kind of build that audience over time. So don't expect that when you push live or to go live the first time that you're going to have a $900,000 a hundred thousand dollars 900,000 people watching your live. It takes time to build that community, that audience that really cares and that they would even trust you.


With their time. I think that's a big thing that we're seeing with people with the rise of social media. It's a trust factor. Can I even trust you with my time? Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. They want to know that it's valuable. If they're going to sit down and watch it, they want to know that you have, you know, like I said, you don't have to be a professional at this, but you definitely need to have some type of a, you know, plan in place.


So you have to know where you're going with, so, yeah. All right. All right. This phone should be your favorite tech problems. Hey, tech problems. I'm sure anyone, so I, so here we're going to, we're going to jump back into our, into our comments here, right? So we put out a poll on our, on our live here that you can do.


And it was very surprising. So we said, have you used Facebook live before? So if you're watching right now in your life, uh, make sure to vote. It's right there on your screen. Vote. Uh, but it was interesting. We're at a 50, 50 split right now, and I know several people have voted because it was like 100% yes for quite a while.


Now it's like 80 and back to, you know, different, different percentages. Now we're down to a 50%. Uh, so it's very interesting to see where we're at with that. But a lot of times people are afraid of. Having tech issues. Yeah. Right. And so, um, I think just being transparent. Like I said, tonight we're using OBS, which is a new software I've used long years and years ago, trying it out again, seeing if it works, because we're just figuring out different solutions.


And so it is one of the things of being able to be authentic with your people and saying, Hey, you know, we're trying this and we may mess up, but, um, you know, hang with me. I think that that the cool part about live is being authentic. Like I've hit my face on the Mike on twice because Brian has shoved it in my face because I don't, I tend to move around, um, because I don't like being up that close.


Um, and so there's going to be times where you do stuff that's kind of silly, but that's the whole point of live. It's supposed to be authentic. It's not supposed to be an anchored show. Yeah. I'm not that you cannot do an anchored show, but. It really where live is at its best is where it's that authentic thing.


And we've had plenty of tech issues that happen, and we are a professional company that has professional gear, but we're going to have problems too. There's always something, always something. There's never a time that, like even tonight we had the stream key issue. It was just something, and unless you're in the world of streaming, you don't even know what that is and you're using your phone, do, you don't even have to worry about what that is.


Um, but just those little things, it's like, Oh, the number was off, or it was, I've got it from the wrong location right. Just little things that happen, which makes it a really good point that actually the more gear that you get, the more problems that actually can't happen. And so, you know, starting small and working that way to understand what you're doing, don't just go out and buy a $1,500 camera.


Yup. Yup. Yeah. They don't even know how to work well and think that it's just going to solve all the problems. Cause it doesn't. So not at all. Yeah. But if you do want to talk gear. I'm all about talking some tech. Yes. And he really is into that. So please drop your comments if you have ever had issues with Facebook live or one of those things or camera questions cause he likes to talk about him with me and I am not as interested in, she's not all right.


Okay. So kind of on the same vibe. We had tech issues. The fifth fear that we were going to talk about was, I'm going to embarrass myself. Okay. Yeah, that doesn't, the only thing I can think of right is, is the video of the guy who is, who is a news anchor. He was a commentary, I guess. And so he's sitting in his home office and then his like little toddler comes from the background.


He was a reporter and, you know, live on this big show. Uh, it's one of those things that people are super forgiving and as long as you're not. Dropping all kinds of cuss words and different things and doing something crazy. Right. Uh, then most of the time, if it's a genuine mistake, people actually think it's endearing.


Like it's, it's pretty funny. So there are a lot of times too, if you're going to embarrass yourself, like sometimes it's, I mean, honestly everybody does. And that it makes it even more authentic too. I think there's more of a connection with that. So. Sure, and I think you're a lot more relaxed if you're not trying to be perfect.


Um, and that's something, um, I don't know if this is something that we'll talk about later, but you know, it just more of a communication practice, but if you're trying to memorize everything that you're going to say, you'll mess up a lot more. Um, just kind of being comfortable with what you're talking about, you're going to be so much more natural.


Um, and so don't be worried about making misses. Steaks. There's always going to be things that are funny that happens, but if you're kind of confident in who you are and that it's okay, it's not the end of the world situation. I can understand if you are. A marketer and you're representing a business that's not necessarily yours.


There is a little bit more pressure there and I get that, but still being comfortable. If it's a place that you like to work at and being comfortable with what you do, normally, you're very good at what you do and you understand what you're talking about. There's no really reason that you have to be perfect and completely rigid.


Yeah, absolutely. Well, just even that, I mean, I don't think. Even in working for another company that you want to handle yourself professionally, like you said, but even in that, people make mistakes all the time when they come in businesses. So it is one of those things where you're like, they don't expect you in the business to be absolutely perfect all the time.


And so they shouldn't expect that on camera either, so. Absolutely. Yeah. All right. All right. So we have, before we go jump into our last one here. Uh, we're down to a 60, 40 splits. Have you used Facebook live before? 60% of people say, ah, Nope. And 40% has to say they have. That's actually higher than what I thought it was, so that's awesome.


That's great. Maybe after this episode, they're gonna be like, I'm going to try it. I'll try it out. All right. We're going to jump into the last common fear, which is do not like the sound of my own voice, which I mentioned that ahead of time. Right. I could hear my, my Southern twang come out when I hear your voice.


I don't actually hear a lot of Southern. Are you from the South though? Too. Originally, I grew up, since I was five, I was born in Chicago. Oh, yeah. See, I remember that. Okay. Okay. Yeah. Well, it is. Well, thank you. I appreciate that. But you can't hear my Southern toying. Um, but it is one of the things, I mean, I'm very, very critical of my own voice.


I think a lot of people are, are you really? Yeah. Oh yeah. I have. I hide it. Well, apparently. That's really good. We've been working for a while to get there. Absolutely. That's awesome. Okay, so the actually have a cool quote of why we typically do not like our voice. Hmm. Um, okay, so it's a very technical, so I'm gonna try to like skip some of it a little bit, but when, okay.


So according to Rachel Feldman at the Washington post, when we hear other people speak, our ear drums and inner ears vibrate from the sound waves coming in from outside vibrations that the brain converts into. Sound. The same is true when we hear ourselves speaking, but added to these external sound waves or other internal vibrations from deep within our bodies.


Okay. Vibrations from our vocal chords and airways that get added into the mix. So there's more sound when we're talking. Oh, okay. That we're used to hearing makes sense. As a result, the voice we hear inside our heads is lower, richer, and there's some adjective. I have no idea how to say. Um, but it's just richer because of extra rumblings and hearing, um, coming from outside ourselves.


Um, so any say when we hear our recorded voice, all that inner rumblings is completely removed. So what it says is that our S our voice in South tiny and alien. Yeah. It's no wonder we don't like it without the deeper and Richard undertones added by our internal hearing system. Yeah. Yeah. I can, I can relate with that.


Yup. I can cause even now, so as I'm wearing my super awesome in here, like I sound a lot deeper than what I think. Whenever I will hear this recording, I'm like, wow, I sound like a puny guy. I need to get you that. I never heard your voice and thought, Oh my gosh. Yeah. So I have definitely heard my voice and it seems way higher than what I'm normally.


Yeah. But, so anyways, there's actually a reason for that. Um, but it is definitely not a reason. Take her life. You know it's true. You should still be alive no matter what. It's your voice and that's what other people are used to hearing is your voice. So just because you're not comfortable with it means you should probably just stop talking in general, out in public and everyday life, if you're still uncomfortable.


Anyway, sorry. All right, we're moving on here. So how do we overcome or conquer these fears? People have stayed with us. Thank you. Cause we're here now. We have arrived. Yes. Um, okay. So we're going to go over our top 10 tips to conquer your fear of going live. Hopefully after this, um, you can feel a little bit more empowered to overcome that fear and actually start going live on a regular basis.


Okay. So the first one is to understand why you're uncomfortable and confront it. Okay. So we've talked about like the psychology, the biology, that there are reasons why you actually feel the way that you do. You're not crazy by any means. Yeah. Um, but if you understand those things, you can move forward from that.


Um, also understanding like. If your brain is playing tricks on you, or do you have a negative image of yourself? And then it's a little bit of self-help talk here, but I mean, honestly, if you have a confident image of who you are, you're going to be more confident to push that, you know, play button alive.


My goodness, I cannot talk tonight, the laugh button. Um, and you know, it's kind of going back to that confirmation bias that if you're looking for yourself to look awful, you're going to find it. Yeah. Um, and so understanding that and, and confronting that. Yeah. That is, that is an interesting and like self, um, is your body image, how you feel like you look and sound.


Um, and the, I think it's good for people to take photos, like see the, all the candid photos of yourself, right? Yeah. And just become comfortable so that way whenever you are on camera, it's not the first time you're seeing yourself. Right? Um, yeah. And just be okay with it because there are people in your life that love you, hopefully, if not, we love you.


Oh my gosh. And so, uh, just be understanding of that. Right? So I understand that, that there are people that care about you. And so this is getting real deep. Sorry. Just understand that, that, you know, people like you. I'm good enough. I'm smart enough and doggone it, people like me. This is going to be a really hard transition to our next one.


No, I haven't. I hadn't read the next one here. Oh,


Oh, that's good. All right. Is that people do not care, but there's a deeper. Meaning to this, people do not care that you're not perfect. Yes, absolutely. I should, should've been a completion of that stuff. Okay. So I actually used to teach speech to high school students. Um, and so they were deeply afraid of public speaking.


Um, and I just had to tell them like, you have to be honest. It's not that people don't care about you, like, like, just like you said, I was like, people do not care. That greatly about what you're presenting. Yeah, they just don't, and I was like, they're gonna like zone out. They're going to daydream a little bit.


Like it's, it's really not that big of a deal and it really helps me. I used to be terrified of public speaking and it really helped me realize that not everyone is 100% engaged. They're writing down notes, they're really critiquing what I'm doing, and they don't care as much as you do. And so really understanding like you are your own worst critic and you always will be and people do not care as much as you do.


And if you bring attention to a, a mess up. Or a mistake. A lot of times people didn't even notice that. Absolutely. And so you bring attention to it because you're nervous about it. A lot of times it is worse than just skipping over it. Moving on. Yeah. I think we've created so many videos with clients for theirselves and everything.


There is no such thing as a perfect video. No, no, not at all. There's always things that you could have done better, even from a speaking, from a shooting perspective, you know, editing all of the things. There is nothing that will ever make it perfect. And so if you're trying to achieve that, you're going to fail every time.


And so, you know, just finding those measures of success that are important to you is important as well. Yeah, absolutely. That's good. Okay. That was it. That was an okay transition. We're okay. We survived that transition. We're good. We're good. We're good here. Okay, so the next one, and I apologize, our numbers on our, our Google doc kinda got, they're all number ones.


So if I get off track, I apologize. Number one, things you should do was to breathe. My Apple watch reminds me of this all the time, and it's usually in a stressful situation and it hasn't. While we're doing this podcast. That's cool. I told me to stand up. It was like, you better stand up. Yeah. But just breathing is good.


And actually those exercises on, on your Apple watch are good. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. So when I was actually reading and doing some research about the fight or flight thing, that was one of the ways that you can overcome that is that if you are like hyperventilating, your body is saying you're in a stressful situation.


It's going to continue to feel that way. So if you start to breathe, you can trick your body into, actually. Starting to calm down and say, I'm not in a stressful situation. I'm okay, which you're not because you're in front of the camera. I may attack you. So breathing is actually a really important thing to help you feel safe and relax.


And then naturally, then you can actually start thinking clearly. You can actually see what you're prepping with. You know all the things when you feel so mad that you want to reward. Take a deep breath, count to four Daniel tiger. Shout out there for all the top the tiger. He understood. He knew what was up.


Just saying, why is, why is Daniel tiger? All right, moving on. Number one.


Oh, me. Oh, uh, look just past the top of the lens. So when you're on video, right? And this is more when you have a camera. So we have a camera right now, I'm looking at the top and anybody can comment right now and say. That I'm not one that are Caleb bouncing. Um, but look at the top of the lens. It actually does.


It makes it a little bit easier cause like we have a little Mark at the top. Um, I'm seeing Zeiss cause that is a really nice lens and I'm very proud of that lens. Shout out to Jason Miller of red barn studio. There's some say it at work and getting some nice lenses here. Uh, but yeah, that helps obviously because if you're looking directly into that lens, that does get intimidating cause it looks like an eyeball staring right back at you.


What does any office where it was like a old salesman trick where it's like you look at the middle of their forehead. Do. I says that to Angela. I'm looking. It's like, Oh yeah, don't, he's just like, I can't look in your eyes anymore. He's like, Oh, don't just look in the middle of my forehead. That's an old sales trick.


So there you go. It's an old live video trick. Look at the top of the lens. Sorry, I went way off track with that. No, that's completely fine. But I mean, there are small tricks that you can do to make yourself feel a little bit more comfortable. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, that was really good. Okay. Okay, so this one, we cannot harp on enough, but practice makes perfect.


So if you only go live. Once every other month, it's never going to feel comfortable cause you're not doing it very often. And so doing it all the time, um, before your first live, you can also practice before you go live, actually just click a record button on your phone and everything and just actually see yourself on video.


So you're a little bit more comfortable doing it, but do not let that stop you from going on live. Oh, absolutely. Yeah. Because even in a live situation, you figure out. There's no, there's no do overs. So I have to in like a mental game too where you're just pushed through and we do that when I'm recording with a lot of people, if they're doing like sit down and interview style and like just go through, don't even, don't even stop it.


Even if you mess up, just keep, keep going because you get in a mental mode where it's like, if you think that you can stop because you messed up, you will every single time. Right? Yeah. Um, and so going live actually forces you to just do it. And so making sure to practice that, like walking through, a lot of public speakers do this where they'll, they'll talk, they'll go through their talk and they'll record themselves and kind of critique themselves a little bit if they still do the talk.


Oh yeah, absolutely. So it's kinda the same situation. So that's good. I think like the more, you know, I had not gone previously to working with you, Brett. I had not gone live. And that's just not what I do. Um, she never wanted to be in front of a camera or behind a microphone. So and so. And now I have a lot of practice and I, I don't, for the most part, I don't ever get nervous.


Plus Brian makes it, it's usually my fault. It's something happens cause I'm freaking out. I'm like, get closer to the microphone Lauren, cause I'm moving around. I'm going to do that for you, please. All right. all right, so this seems like obvious, but I feel like it needs to be said. If you, if you look good, you feel good.


So it means just a common trick. If you want to feel confident and dress confidently, like don't wear the thing that you like. Well, I kind of look fat in this shirt. Don't wear that shirt the day you're going live. Yup. Yup. I'll do that a lot. Actually. Just even our podcast recordings. There's a lot of things I'm like, man, I shouldn't have wore this.


Weren't worn the shirt, and I mean, it really does. It affects your performance or prospects, your engagement. It's not even about you. It's about the people you're trying to serve. And so feel confident in that, right? Yeah, absolutely. We're sweat pants. Just feel confident. You know what I'm saying? I didn't think about that the other day though, because we were actually working in the office for several hours and then we had booked a podcast recording.


And I hadn't even thought about that. And then by the end of the recording, I realized I had never like checked my hair. I hadn't done anything. I was just so like into the just going. So I probably looked pretty bad, but it's okay. Yeah, I was going to say something about it, so, yeah. All right. I'm just teasing.


All right. So prepare what you are going to say. So that's the thing. Yeah. Yeah. So it is good. We talked about this having a plan, right? We always talk about three bullet points. If you're going live, obviously this is an extremely long live and not typical of what we tell people we're work with. Right? 10 15.


And it's 20 minutes roughly where you want to stand, because that gets the most engagement. That's enough time to deliver some content. Um, most of the time, if you're turning it into a podcast episode, 20 minutes is a good time for people to drive to work or drive to drop their kids off or whatever, right?


Or run on the treadmill, but practice what you're going to say. You usually have three bullet points and do not memorize, Nope. Don't memorize. And also have 10 number ones. Yeah. Cause that's not confusing. Not at all. The last ones, dad, don't do that. Alright. Alright. Number nine. I just said this, focused on your audience, right?


Yeah, you did actually. So number nine, focus on your audience, not you. It's not about you. Sorry. It's just not about you. People don't care. People don't care. They love you, but they don't care. Uh, yeah, but like, I mean, again, that's what we always talk about. Like I had somebody, I'm in a podcast group and someone's like, Hey, are there too many business podcasts out there?


And it's like, well, it just depends on who you're trying to serve, right? I listened to multiple podcasts and different marketing ones, and I like each specific podcast for a, for the hosts, like I feel like I connect with them on different levels. I like the way they joke or how they address topics. So you never know.


You find your voice, but it's all about your audience. Absolutely. I, I, man, you nailed it. Hey, thanks. Thank you. Yeah. All right. All right. So last one, right? Yep. Go ahead. Okay. Prepare for a mistakes. So, like we said earlier, there is no perfect video. Um, and so just be prepared that you're going to make mistakes and just let them roll or laugh it off.


It's not a big deal. Um, we've made a couple mistakes during this live, and it has not, for the most part, it is not a. Ruffled us to the point where we cannot continue. I mean, it, it just makes us more authentic and probably more relatable to be really honest. That we're real people. We have real lives. We have stressful days or had relaxnews, you know, whatever it might be.


Um. But, uh, definitely prepare for mistakes. And that's one of the reasons, particularly we will repeat, do not memorize what you're going to say that because when you do mess up, then you won't be able to recover. Yup. Absolutely. Yeah. And that is one of the things too. I was actually gonna pull it up here, but we have, um, you know, some of our podcasts episodes, I mean, we record those live for the most part, right?


Yeah. Um, there are even mistakes in those, right. And so it's always just be understanding of, Hey, this is not going to be perfect. And that's okay. Yeah, absolutely. I'm all right. That was really good. All right. Yeah, I like, there's a lot of information there. There is so much information in there and, uh, if you're watching our livestream right now, you have any questions, let us know.


Um, if you are listening to this after the fact, make sure you check out our Facebook page. Uh, facebook.com/and go rogue and make sure that you're on there. Subscribe, like comments, all the things we'd love to interact with you. Um, but also, I think this has been a, it's been a great episode. All right, so we will see you guys next time.


Thanks again.


Rapid fire questions. Let's go. Okay. Where would you go if you were invisible?


Oh, that's so weird. I know. It's kind of a creepy question. Okay, so I don't care where, which side you're on, but if you were an invisible on, you could walk into the white house where no one's in performing. What is going on in that place? Like you would be, so you know, it might be interesting or scary. I don't know.


I think it'd be interesting. Okay. Mine would actually probably be like a travel bag and time thing is you're just invisible and just invisible. Why can't I add things to this? Oh gosh. Okay. Well, I was thinking, I was like, it'd be cool to be in the garage with like Steve jobs whenever you know him and, um, which house?


Cause like coming up with the first


time, uh, maybe see what's a old, um. What's, Oh gosh, Yolanda, like in the boardroom with like Tesla dealers or like the designers of Tesla. That would be kind of cool. I'd be like hanging out in there. Right. That's cool. Yeah. It's not creepy. That's cool. Yeah, it is. It's the one that definitely verges on the creepy side and it does.


Yeah. So. Again, we're recording this live so you can, in the comments, answer that question. Where would you go if you were in business? Yup. All right. Next question. Okay. What is the last item you purchased for yourself? This isn't like, I went to Walmart and bought bananas. I'm saying an item that you like picked out, like kind of like a treat yourself.


This shirt. Really? Yep. Wow. It was a, I didn't expect to buy it and so, and a shout out to my weight, Walmart peeps. It is. That's a good shirt. Wait, Walmart. They've inspired me. Actually. I'm starting to be like, you know what? I know. What, through the stuff. I got some like kind of hidden things in there.


They're trying, they've got some cool stuff. So proud of him and it was like $7. He wasn't appearance. I'm cheap. Okay. So $7 shirt is awesome. Yeah. How about you? Um. I think it was, I bought just to fun like a Apple watch bands or like the really cheap, just colorful, fun ones. They're not going to last me a lifetime by any means, but just more fun that weren't like the professional like I need to look cause you know around here.


Extremely, extremely professional. They were kind of fun, so, yeah. Gotcha. Very exciting. You know, exciting as a Walmart shirt, dude. Seriously. And they did tell, they're like, Hey, when you're changing your dressing room or whatever, like take a shot of like you in the in the shirt and I'll never do that. It wasn't the last thing I bought was the Sensi that you didn't bring.


No, that's not my fault. Alex fitting, if you're out there listening, watching right now. Oh, Lauren is very sad that she didn't get her Cincy today, so, alright. Hey, we're out. That was good. Uh, Bay pier, the ankle has Lambeth.

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